The Testicle Shrinker

Back when the open space beside the PowerPlant Mall was still a parking lot, many people from the law school who were too arsed into getting basement parking stickers found it more convenient to park there.

Unfortunately, people who do park there run into the risk of parking next to cars that require two parking slots, such as this Ferrari.Of course, if you were such a law student (one who is eternally broke) and driving a piece of junk such as that beat up Sentra to the left of the Ferrari, I'm sure your balls would shrink, too.

Your balls would shrink if your raggedy-ass Nissan had aftermarket door locks haphazardly installed in Banawe because new dealer-installed door locks were way beyond your budget. They'd shrink too if your Nissan's ignition switch could be turned by anything flat, like say, a screwdriver, which happened to be in your pocket.

To save your pride, you could take a picture of yourself beside the shining red Ferrari, as if to claim ownership, but you know everyone who does that doesn't actually own the Ferrari. You're above that. So you stay away and take this picture to commemorate the day your balls shrank so much they retreated into your abdominal cavity. In fact, they retreated so much, you became, for all of two seconds, Nancy Navalta.

And then the moment passes. All becomes well and you worship God's good grace that he gave you an opportunity to ogle a prancing black stallion wearing a red dress without looking like some kind of idiot. After all, he did park beside you.